Wholeness to be found in my inner universe

I used to think I was not complete until I would find the Other. In the outside Universe. That way I kind of lost the relationship with myself. The older I became the more empty it felt. I was surrounded by loving people but I felt lonely. I used to have a very luxurious lifestyle but all it brought me was despair. Then I discovered suddenly as if hit by lightening! Wholeness is inside of me. By identifying all the Me's, form a peace comity between them, I changed my strategy. Only recently. 3 months and 3 days ago I suddenly realised the power of this change. Now I only need to learn and control this amazing energy and flow. That is a little harder then I thought. So easily things split up again and wholeness disappears for a while. That hurts. If you have experienced this wholeness for only a second your hooked. You know suddenly that this is the entire purpose. For a moment you think you are there....and then you wake up into the daily reality of the material world. Integration of these two experiences is the only thing I can think of. So return to the Peace committee and start to negotiate on another truce. If I want to win this war, I need to understand I cannot win all battles. (sometimes an armistice is the best solution until I am strong enough to return to battle.

Not this time. This time I am going trough a phase were things are very much for Real! And I will see in a few weeks how it will develop. I am very focused to my job and blessed by many loving friends here at Zaadz. That sure feels good!  

Wholeness is to be found inside of me in my inner universe and when this wholeness comes out my world starts to change for the better.

Leendert van Velsen